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 This is Aubrey Elizabeth. She was born weighing 1lb 5oz and she measured 12 3/4 inches. She looks so skinny because she had trouble holding on to fluids. She lost a lot of weight after she was born. She eventually fattened up, sort of. She liked to move a lot and she often pulled at her lines and tubes. She seemed to be feisty and a bit restless in her incubator. She liked to sleep with her hands above her head. She was so cute. I think she was the one always moving and kicking inside my belly.

This is Ellie Alexandra. She weighed 1lb 4oz at birth and measured 12 3/4 inches. Since their birth we learned that they are identical twins with nonidentical personalities. Ellie was our mellow girl. So calm and sweet all the time. She also had very fine blond hair and long blond eyelashes.


Aubrey and Ellie were born at 24 weeks and 4 days gestation, four months too soon. The doctors cannot find a reason for why I went into labor so early with them. Other than being premature, they were born perfect. They had ten fingers, ten toes, all their organs and no deformities or illnesses. All of the illnesses and injuries they experienced were a result of their struggle to survive outside the womb. They were not born sick or damaged, they became that way as a result of being born so prematurely. Both of them were so precious. It was unfathomably hard not to be able to hold them or nurse them. We wanted so badly to comfort them. Kirk and I would reach inside their incubators and hold their little hands. Our love for them ran deep. Our attachment was profound. We hoped and prayed for them to live and cried often at the fear of losing them. In the end however they both went to be with Jesus. Kirk and I had the privilege of holding them in our arms as they took their last breaths. Losing them truly broke our hearts. They each took a piece of our hearts with them to heaven. Our hearts will never be whole again. We desperately miss them and always will.