Monday, October 20, 2008

Another Death

Today my aunt died. Cancer. She is with the Lord now without question and no longer suffering. I rejoice that she is whole, but I am still very sad. I loved her. She was always a good Aunt to me and my sisters. She loved us. Her and I also formed a unique bond when my girls died. She also lost a baby daughter over thirty five years ago. She was so broken hearted for me. She knew my pain. I found comfort in that.

I went to visit her two weeks ago. We live three hours from each other. I wanted to spend time with her and tell her how much I loved her before she passed away. She was very sick and in a lot of pain.

I sat in her room while she slept. And when she woke up I rubbed her feet with lotion. She asked me how I was doing and I started to cry. First of all I could not believe that she was asking about me in her condition. I guess that is just the kind of person she was. She truly cared about others. She knew I was hurting. And she was right, I was. She hugged me and told me that she knows how hard it is, that she cried on her daughter's birthday for twenty years, but life is still full of so many blessings. That she feels so blessed to have lived the live she did. She must have said how blessed she felt thirty times.

Hearing her say that gave me hope. She had made it through her grief to live her life, and not just any life, but one full of blessings. If she could I know I will too. It will just take time.

My aunt will be dearly missed by many. A lot of people loved her. I wish she could still be with us, but I do think it is beautiful that she met her daughter in Heaven today. I am sure she never stopped longing to see her baby, no matter how blessed her life was. And that ache in her heart is finally gone. She is with her Jesus and her daughter now. There is peace in that only a mother who has lost a child can understand.

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